Blast From My Past...Becoming a Submissive Wife
Greetings sisters,
I came across this post I did on my old blog many years ago and wanted to share it here. I hope it blesses you.
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God instituted marriage and it should be partaken of by those who desire to dedicate their life together serving God and not themselves. Born again followers of Jesus Christ will long to be obedient to His word in all areas of the Bible and that includes a joyous submission and serving of our husbands as their helpmeet.
Christ is the head of man and man the head of woman (1 Cor 11:3) so just as Jesus Christ was in submission to God, He was equal; and in the eyes of God a woman has equal value as a man.
(Acts 10:34 tells us that God is no respecter of persons, meaning He holds none above another.) So although a woman is instructed in the Bible (Col 3:18, Titus 2:4-5, 1 Peter 3:1-2) to submit to her husband it does not mean that she is inferior to him
Although it is not my place to instruct a man, I will include the scriptures that explain the role of a husband toward his wife.
Ephesians 5:25-33
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her
26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word,
27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.
28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.
29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church—
30 for we are members of his body.
31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”
32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church.
33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
What a beautiful picture this paints as women yearn to be completely and sacrificially loved by their husbands and husbands long for respect and submission. If joined together as God had intended, this creates a wonderful flowing circle that gives fulfillment to each partner. Now keep in mind ladies that we are not to focus on what our husbands should be doing, leave that up to God as He will take care of them in that department. We are to focus on what God would have us ladies do.
Ephesians 5:22 Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.
This verse; although short, is very powerful. 'As to the Lord' explains how we should submit to our husbands. How many believers are going to question Jesus Christ? How many of us will doubt or mumble under our breaths when we read His instructions? Would we actually stand there and argue with Him? If we are to treat our husbands as we would treat the Lord then we must stop sinning and learn how to submit to the men that God has put in authority over us. Yes, I meant to use that word, authority.
God created man and then gave him a wonderful helpmeet-woman. (Do you realize that Adam named Eve?) She was not created to be his boss or to tell him how to be a man, she is to be his helper and he is to have authority over her. Let's go back again to the garden of Eden. Who was deceived? Eve. Who didn't step up and protect her? Adam. So after this fall of sin, God steps in and outlines the structure of marriage, telling Adam he is in charge of providing and protecting his family and Eve is in charge of taking care of the home and bearing/raising children.
So let me paint a scenario here...man is to be the protector of the home and I think most women would certainly agree that this is a wonderful plan, correct? So let's say someone is trying to break into your house...do you want your husband to go ask you what you think he should do? Should he wait for your decision or instructions on how to take care of the situation? You'd want him to know what to do and to take immediate action! Now add this to the thought...say he tells you to get in the bedroom and lock the door. If you comply then he knows you are safe and out of immediate danger while he deals with the situation, but if you don't listen and instead stand behind him, he will have 2 things to worry about; one being the intruder and two, you either getting in the way or being harmed by the intruder.
Ladies, if we want our husbands to have full responsibility in protecting us and those in our homes we need to stop picking out of the buffet of circumstances by choosing which ones he's responsible for; we need to stand back and allow him to protect us in all areas of life. All of them. Two people cannot hold the steering wheel so ladies we must learn how to let go and allow our husbands to drive. In this way we are being obedient to God and encouraging our husbands to also do so.
Because many women will say 'But you don't know how hard that is'....let me share with you my testimony of being a woman in the world to becoming a godly submissive wife. As I've shared in previous posts, I used to be in the corporate world. My career consisted in dealing with 90% men because I was in charge of new product development and of the people I dealt with were males in positions of engineering and manufacturing etc. (Add to that the fact that most of my in-house meetings were men also.) Did I have a lot of pride? You bet. There was no way I was ever going to submit to a man and in fact it became my goal to surpass the authority of any I would come in contact with. I built a fortress around myself and nobody was ever going to tell me what to do or take away the control I had over my life....until I was born again in Jesus Christ.
I grew up 'believing' in God and that Jesus was God Himself, who died for our sins but I did not know that He said we must be born again and then surrender our entire lives to Him. I didn't know that He is a living and interactive God that expects me to repent/turn away from my sins and die for Him in order that He may show me the way to our Father in Heaven. Man made religious organizations teach that if you show up to church service and simply believe in God that you go to heaven. I simply believed but didn't apply it to my life and was not born again or regenerated in Christ until I read the verse John 3:3. Jesus said that we must be born again in order to see the kingdom of heaven.
Once I had given my life to Jesus Christ and started seeking in the Bible what He has to say, It became clear to me what my role was in life. I reflected back to my business days how I had built this platform of which I had to maintain above men and the strength and power to maintain it was exhausting. Inside I wanted to be set free from the world I was in, it was not who I was inside. I was consciously going against the woman God created and instead I conditioned myself to be tough in this world; building a fortress around the vulnerable feminine self I harbored safely inside.
When I began to realize how hopeless our human accomplishments are on this earth, I was hungry for the truth of God. I wanted that new life the Bible tells us about and I wanted to be a new creation that Jesus said we would be. I died to myself in order that I might live in Him.
Now, let me say that old habits and conditions of the heart pass away slowly and can be very painful. I went from being what the world would call a successful career woman having and being 'all that'...to being a keeper at home and tending the ways of my household. The more I learned and obeyed truth, the more the old me was shed and the new me was created. I have been transformed from inside out and have gone from a me centered life of survival to a Christ centered life of dependence and trust in Him.
Right after we were regenerated/born again we moved here to the farm and I began a brand new life learning about the character, nature and will of God for my life and submission was on my conscience ever since I read Ephesians 5. Not having a godly, older Titus 2 woman, I was instructed by the His Word in this area (as well as all other areas) so it was a matter of Him speaking to me through His Word and me obeying and following my conscience.
My word to you is....
Learn to obey God in all areas, especially this one. Once we learn to obey and release our hearts to God, He will then teach us how to submit JOYFULLY! I am happy to turn my life over to Jesus and have Him take over so why don't I trust Jesus when He tells me to do the same for my husband?
Ladies, by not submitting to your husband, you are in essence telling Jesus that you don't trust Him to guide your husband in the way he should go. Our men will ultimately be held responsible for how they have cared, protected and provided for the household that God has entrusted in their care so let's be sure to get out from between our husbands and God.
Let's take a look around at the world you see today. We see men standing in line competing against women for jobs, women having authority over men in the workplace and in the government or protection agencies, wives constantly riding their husbands about what should or shouldn't be done, children watch mothers cut down fathers to their face and behind their back thereby destroying trust, wives doing 'their thing' without any regard to what the husband thinks...is it no wonder that men are not being men? They aren't allowed to otherwise they have to put up with a woman's wrath. I used to wonder why there were no real men in the world but now I realize I was part of the problem.
Ephesians 6:12 tells us there is a spiritual war going on in the world. God created man be the provider for his family and He created woman to be his helper. We ladies should wrap our loving arms around him, nourish him with good food for strength,
keep the home tidy, warm and welcoming so that he may rest and be replenished for the next day.
Submission to our husbands allows them to grow into the godly men that God had originally created so let us be a helper to him and bestow this gift joyously!
I pray that you ladies who are seeking to be godly wives through submission that you have the strength to ignore the world and it's ways and instead follow the way of Jesus Christ.
Love in Christ,
Sister Deb
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