Teach The Young Women...To Love Their Husbands

Greetings to our sister saints scattered abroad!

Titus 2 instructions for women may seem basic on the outset but are very detailed from within.

Titus 2:4-5 

That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, [5] To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

 Today I want to focus on the part about loving husbands.  This is just as much a reminder to me as it is instruction or reminder for any of you.

Love...is action.  What we saw Jesus do on the cross for us as He did it while we were yet sinners.  If He waited until He loved us in the flesh (remember we were sinning against Him) it would have never happened.  Likewise, we wives, need to follow that example and love our husbands (that's a command) even if they are difficult to live with.

God gives us a glimpse into one area of the heart of husbands when we read Colossians...

Colossians 3:19 

Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them. 

Today's term would include 'frustrated' alongside 'exasperate'.  God knew men would be this way and He set the guidelines for wives right before that.

Just as Christ loved us while we were in sin, so we wives too, are to love our husbands, even if they are difficult toward us.  Yes, Christian couples have to deal with their flesh; just because they are born of the Spirit doesn't mean they don't have to work through their weaknesses that could last a lifetime...therefore causing marital stress for the duration (with fault on both of their parts).  Of course, over time, some hurdles are passed but we must endure through all hardships, obediently following our Lord's commands.

God knew husbands would be bitter toward wives and He instructs wives to love, reverence and obey them as in the Lord.   

1 Corinthians 1:27-29 

But God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty; [28] And base things of the world, and things which are despised, hath God chosen, yea, and things which are not, to bring to nought things that are: [29] That no flesh should glory in his presence.

This goes along with 1 Peter 3 with wives winning a husband without a word.  A weak way to win someone would be to not say anything, but through a quiet, obedient life, it has a profound effect on the disobedient husband.

Of course a wife has her own flesh to deal with and when troublesome situations arise, she is expected to react in a biblical manner.  If a husband is bitter (frustrated or exasperated) with his wife and she is blameless, she needs to continue to be blameless and not be drug into sin and confound the situation further.  She needs to examine the (each) situation to make sure she was biblically obedient, or did she contribute to the situation.

Both men and women have expectations in a relationship and to be honest, most of them are a bit far fetched as long as we live in these fleshly bodies.  There will never be a perfect marriage without frustration, tears, hurt feelings, anger etc.  Some marriages will have more than others but all will suffer to some degree, because of flesh.  That's why we have commands in God's word to guide and rebuke us.

So how does a wife 'love' her husband?  By obeying God and in that he will reap the rewards of it.  She will kill her flesh and cultivate a meek and quiet spirit.  If he's unjustly bitter against her she will remember Matthew 5:44...

...to love her enemies, bless those that curse her, do good to them that hate her. If she only loves him if he's good, what reward does she have?  Then it says in vs 48 to be perfect, which means mature.  

Maturity. A goal we strive for but it seems elusive when going through trials doesn't it? A sister once confessed that her and her husband 'feed off each other' when they have troubles.  Yep, that's common for all, as once you slip a bit in the flesh, it's like an avalanche and it just won't stop. 

We wives will be held accountable for our part and we need to be obedient and blameless lest we be provokers and participants in the destructive issues in a marriage. We need to bless and heap coals (Romans 12:20) and win them with our quiet and obedient life.  Harder said than done sometimes but if we follow our Savior's example we can.

He was oppressed and afflicted yet He opened not his mouth. Vs 7.   

This is what we want to be:

Ephesians 5:27 

That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.

Holy and without blemish, not having spot or wrinkle...that's a tall order but nevertheless a command to strive for.

How do we do that? By focusing on our own obedience and striving to be perfect (mature).  By killing our flesh to love our husbands just as we want them to kill their flesh and love us. 

We are to kill such things as:

 

... hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions....  (Galatians 5:20)

And strive for...

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, [23] Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law. [24] And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts. [25] If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit. [26] Let us not be desirous of vain glory, provoking one another, envying one another.(Galatians 5:22-26 )

Our Saviour showed us how to do it for His bride, receiving nothing in return, can we not do the same for our husband in honor of our Savior?  Brother Jim wrote a post called Husbands Love Your Wives.

http://spiritandtruthdiscernment.blogspot.com/2017/09/husbands-love-your-wives.html 

It's all about serving the Lord, not our flesh and through that we will press one another on, provoking unto love and good works (Hebrews 10).

Have a joyous day in the Lord.

Sister Deb

The biblical gospel...

https://www.dontperish.com/the-gospel.html